DiaBLOGue

Neighbors
      they were, when they broke up your baptisms
Americans
      they were, when they scattered your press

I don’t know where I was or what I was doing when news spread about what has become known as the November 2015 exclusion policy. I might not have known about it at all. At the time, I was a high school senior, a member of the debate team, an active Latter-day Saint, a Boy Scout, a priest. Devout, in a way that doesn’t ask too many questions.

The decision by leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to implement a new policy in November 2015 that categorized those who entered into a same-sex marriage as apostates, and restricted salvific…

Having experienced the 2015 exclusion policy as a gay Latter-day Saint father of five and a senior leader in Affirmation: LGBTQ Mormons, Families & Friends, I am experiencing the tenth anniversary of “The Policy” as…

A good friend walked into my office in November 2015 and slumped into the chair opposite mine, utterly distraught. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints had just updated its leadership handbook to define…

As someone who is gay and grew up in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, it has been an interesting journey to witness changes by the Church in how it understands and treats…

You want me to make it less
complicated
want me to smooth the way,
and say, that to me, the path
is easy.

Trans and gender nonbinary Latter-day Saints have become increasingly visible in recent years, sparking public debates about their place within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. These debates have emerged as transgender visibility gains prominence in American and global political discussions, leading to conflicts over access to long-standing medical protocols, bathrooms, sports participation, housing, employment, religious belonging, and more. The heightened panic and polarization surrounding this topic have resulted in alarming rates of surveillance, regulation, violence, and harassment faced by transgender individuals, even as some sectors of society have shown greater tolerance.

I don’t remember who told me about the POX. I have an idea, but it would be a guess. I do remember looking at a lamp while she did it. There was a water stain on the table. I traced the white edges, foamy and hard at the same time.

For much of my life, I tried to be the man everyone expected me to be—faithful, successful, and called by God to lead—but inside, I struggled with gender dysphoria. My journey toward self-acceptance, detailed in my memoir Dictates of Conscience: From Mormon High Priest to My New Life as a Woman (Signature Books, 2024), led me to transition while serving as a stake president and working as a church architect.